


It's the Best Time of the Year

by anarchycox



Series: Missing: Four Demons (If Found Return to Hell) [21]
Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Demons, Christmas, Christmas Party, Fluff, Holiday Cheer, M/M, couples figuring out christmas, happiness, the boss comes to visit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2019-12-21
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:29:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21888946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anarchycox/pseuds/anarchycox
Summary: Merlin and Eggsy are a couple and have decided to celebrate Christmas. Merlin is going to make sure that his human has the best Christmas imaginable.
Relationships: Merlin/Gary "Eggsy" Unwin
Series: Missing: Four Demons (If Found Return to Hell) [21]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1335727
Comments: 37
Kudos: 205





	It's the Best Time of the Year

“Eggsy?”

“Yeah, baby?” Eggsy looked up from dinner. “Brilliant as ever, by the way.”

“Thank you. I have a concern about our relationship.”

Eggsy put his fork down. “Of course. What do you need to talk about?”

“Christmas,” Merlin nodded. “It is a few weeks away. I have mixed feelings about the whole enterprise, but would welcome your opinion.”

“I’m a fan?” Eggsy half said, half asked. He leaned back in his chair a bit. “This is technically your third Christmas.”

“The first doesn’t count because I didn’t notice much about it as I knew my time was nearing the end, I could feel it.” Merlin was pushing the food around on his plate, and usually he loved it when he made Italian. “The second we were friends, and you barely decorated, doing all your celebrating at your mother’s.”

“And this year we are a couple,” Eggsy smiled a bit. “Partners.”

“Aye. I am torn,” Merlin admitted. 

“Okay, this is going to be a humans are weird talk with a whole whack of relationship negotiation isn’t it?” Eggsy was watching him, and Merlin just shrugged. “I’ll clean up bring pudding and a cuppa into the living room. We’ll get this all sorted out.” He rounded the table and kissed Merlin’s head. “Go on, then,” he nudged, and Merlin went to the living room. Eggsy cleaned up and tried to think of all the ways that Christmas could be a thing to be torn over, preparing counter arguments, or just explanation. He put together a tray and took it to the living room, where Merlin was playing with a rope with JB. They were so cute together. “Right, so why are you torn over Christmas?”

“To call Jesus, God’s only child is complete bullshit,” Merlin said. “He made Adam and Eve, by definition they are his children too. And technically he made us. Now I renounce the stick in the mud, but I mean all things being equal -”

“It is a holiday people built around for you what seems like wot, a da forgetting his first children when he remarries?” 

“It is nothing at all like that,” Merlin said but then had to pause. “Though I suppose it is the closest comparator. I mean god can kiss my arse, he sucks and I am glad every damn day that I jumped, but still.”

“But still.” Eggsy squeezed his thigh. “And sorry, god can’t kiss your arse, my job.”

“Really though, the church just co-opted other holidays for it. And do you know there is a 17% uptick in souls that are in the grey area tipping over to my department during the holiday season. It is a mass of depression and consumerism and crassness, and Bing Crosby is in my department you know. I hate his voice.”

“Yeah, never really did it for me either. But all that is reason for you to not like Christmas, or at least not get what the fuss is about. You said torn, though.” Eggsy took a biscuit off the plate. 

“You sing Christmas carols, and it makes me happy. Daisy is very excited, and that makes me excited. I like the smell of pine. And the fairy lights. I like the fairy lights. And several of my top 100 romance novels are set at Christmas time. It seems that if you have someone that you greatly respect and admire, the holiday could be an acceptable thing.”

“I would never ask you to engage in anything you don’t want,” Eggsy swore, “But I’m not going to lie that it could be fun to do up the whole Christmas thing with you. Especially if it means we hang mistletoe about.” He winked and Merlin gave him a blank look. “You have to kiss the person you are standing under it with.”

“But you can kiss me whenever you want.”

“Bit of holiday spirit, baby,” Eggsy took the cup from Merlin’s hand, and put it on the coffee table. He quickly googled a picture of mistletoe. “Oh look, we are under mistletoe together,” he said as he held up the phone. Eggsy grinned as he crawled into Merlin’s lap. “Tradition, Merlin, we gotta.”

Merlin’s hands settled on his hips. “A traditional Christmas?”

“Why the fuck not, for our first?”

Merlin nodded, “Why the fuck not indeed?” 

And they kissed under the mistletoe.

*

“Why am I the one shopping with you?” Harry grumbled. “If this is for your traditional Christmas with Eggsy, why am I the one at the shops with you?”

“One, remember family rule, he and I avoid shopping together for the sake of the sex I hope we have one day. And two, in several of my books, surprise holiday decorating is met with wonder and joy. I will be bringing him all the wonder and joy that he can stand,” Merlin said, his eyes glowing with the battle light that had at one time pushed back heaven’s archangels. “He wants traditional, we are going to get all traditional up in this house. Tradition out the wazoo. Just no Bing Crosby.”

“Clearly,” Harry shuddered. “But if I help you with this, you have to help me as well.”

“Of course, what is your need?”

“I need to learn the dreidel song.”

“Can’t be that hard.”

“And research Hanukkah in general. It seems more complex than a fake date for a bullshit son that he didn’t even shag to make happen.” Harry poked at a display. “I purchased an antique menorah for my flat. I am doing a little holiday cheer at the shop but not too much. Rich idiots like it ‘tasteful’.” 

Merlin was putting one of everything in their cart. “There is no tasteful this year. Eggsy wants us to do Christmas - we will do Christmas. Oh yes, we will do Christmas.” Merlin was putting a rather tacky door wreath in the cart and paused. "Why is that reindeer staring at me?”

“It is plastic it isn’t staring at anything,” Harry said and then paused as well. He swayed a bit. “No, wait, it is staring at us.” He moved, and they both swore the deer’s eyes were following them. “Possessed?” He reached out and touched the plastic. “No, can’t feel anything.”

“I don’t trust it. It wants to ruin my Christmas with Eggsy,” Merlin scowled at the lawn ornament. “It has plans.” Merlin reached over and found the seam where the plastic and been joined, and snapped the reindeer’s head off. “Much better.” He tossed the head to the ground.

“It is still watching us.”

“And so am I,” a man in waistcoat and Santa hat said. “And you are paying for that and leaving or I call the cops.”

“It was evil.”

“It is plastic, come with me.”

“Can we at least buy everything else as well?”

“No,” the man said.

Harry frowned. “That seems like a poor business practice. He has a few hundred pounds of your crap that is ruining the environment in his cart. Easily covers a shift of the poor people you are abusing during this holiday season.”

“Don’t worry, Harry, he is going to hell for the security camera footage he has,” Merlin smiled at him. “Santa isn’t the only one who sees all.” Merlin’s eyes swirled with colour. “You know, I think we’ll buy what we need at another store.” He nodded. “I’ll see you again, one day.”

They left and the manager didn’t chase after them. “Well, glad we are done for the day,” Harry clapped his hands together. “Better luck next time?”

“Christmas cheer. For Eggsy,” Merlin looked at him, and Harry just sighed.

“For Eggsy.”

They managed to not decapitate another plastic reindeer that day.

*  
Merlin was putting the finishing touches on the family room. He thought it looked good. He had searched on his Mac book pictures of decorated houses and he thought his work was adequate. Thought the end table only had a Christmas tablecloth, no candle on it. He had not purchased enough candles. He would have to rectify that. There was also a mix of real and plastic mistletoe carefully hung from the ceiling. At half metre intervals. That should make for the kissing opportunities that Eggsy suggested were a part of the holiday experience. He definitely supported that particular traditional.

“Hey babe, the front of the house looks…festive,” Eggsy called as he came into the house. “You are taking this seriously and what the fuck is that?”

Merlin went into the hall. “A Santa statue.”

“With his trousers falling off.”

“The saleswoman suggested it was cheeky.”

“No, don’t actually see his cheeks.” Eggsy properly looked around. “Uhhh, Merlin?”

“Yes?” Merlin smiled and rocked on his heels. He waited for Eggsy to praise all his work. “I have provided a traditional Christmas for you!”

“It looks like a Hallmark movie exploded in here,” Eggsy blinked and looked around. “Whole house like this?”

“Mostly this floor, though there are scattered decorations upstairs. Come see the living room, it is the epicenter really.” Merlin dragged him in. “Ta Da!”

“Wow,” Eggsy said. “Seriously Hallmark movie.”

“You keep saying that, I have no frame of reference?”

“Oh, sure. Basically it is an American channel that runs 24/7 romantic Christmas movies. Picture like a hundred Mills and Boon christmas books made into shitty telly movies.” Eggsy said absentmindedly as he slowly spun looking at all the decor. He then registered what he had said. “Oh god, I shouldn’t have told you about that.”

“Have you known about this all the time I have been with you?” Merlin was glaring at him. “And you didn’t tell me?”

Eggsy winced. “Look, I was saving my own sanity okay? Because you’ll love it at the start and then get sick of how bloody white and misogynist it all is. I was helping you by not telling you. They never have any historical ones, and you know you love historical romance.”

“24/7 Christmas romance, when we are celebrating a traditional Christmas and you were going to keep it secret from me?”

“We are our own Christmas romance, what do you need that heteronormative bullshit for?” Eggsy closed his eyes. “I didn’t mean -”

“I do believe a Christmas fight is also a traditional part of the holiday experience, isn’t it lovely we are getting that over with early?” Merlin picked up the laptop. “Excuse me, I need to do some research on my mac book.”

“My Mac book,” Eggsy said. He tried to smile. “It all looks really festive in here, baby. Love all the mistletoe.”

“Mistletoe is being ignored for 48 hours,” Merlin said, and stalked off to find out about this Hallmark channel.

“Well, shit,” Eggsy groaned. He started to follow to Merlin but had to pause to stifle a scream. When he looked out the window it seemed like there was a plastic reindeer staring at him. He moved and swore the eyes were following him. Wondered why the head seemed to be taped on though. He quickly closed the curtains, unsettled by the lawn ornament.

*

“Harry, I would have to admit to Eggsy that he was right, and I do not care for that,” Merlin said. He was sitting in Kingsman, which was indeed tastefully decorated. He was also pouting a bit. “I have spent the last three days watching Hallmark channel Christmas movies. One in five is good. Another is okay, two exist, and one would make my soul weep if I had a proper one.”

Harry was cutting fabric and ignoring him, because he knew this was just the start. And indeed, Merlin rambled for about thirty minutes about Hallmark movies. “Just stop watching,” Harry suggested.

“But the tease pulls me in, that maybe this one will be good. That this time the man will give up his wholesome small town existence for the girl, move to the city - reshape his life. But then never does. Why do they hate women with careers. And also why is it always a single dad, not a single mum? And further, how do they have absolutely no people of colour in them. Like they seriously have to work at that. I do like the secret prince ones though. I can only not watch if it is a Candace Cameron Brue one - going to have to deal with her in my division eventually so don’t want to see her face too much now.”

“Mmmhmm,” Harry agreed, and continued to cut fabric. “Do you think Percival will like this Christmas gift?” Harry paused. “Bugger. Hanukkah. Fuck, get it right, Harry. Not that hard. Hanukkah, fuck fuck.” He stopped when Merlin’s arms wrapped around him. “Thank you.”

“He will very much enjoy and appreciate his holiday present,” Merlin promised and kissed his cheek. “I need to invite him to the party.”

Harry went very still. “Party?”

“A part of Christmas, is the Christmas party. I am having one of them. On the 23rd. With finger foods. And music. Not huge, but a good bit. And your boyfriend should be there with you. I have hung a great deal of mistletoe.” Merlin wiggled his eyebrows. “You can kiss him a lot. Made sure it isn’t on his religious night do nothing but god thing he does.”

“I am not sure that is how he explains it.”

“Close enough. Will you extend the invitation to him, or shall I?”

“I can let him know,” Harry said. “Does Eggsy know he is throwing a party?”

“No?” Merlin frowned. “That is bad isn’t it?”

“Yes,” Harry looked at him. “Now you go into the back, and tell him about the party and that he is correct about the Hallmark channel.”

Merlin pouted. “He’ll be smug.”

“Deal with it.”

Merlin nodded, and headed into the back.

*

“Merlin, I hate you,” Eggsy said as he fussed again with the plates on the kitchen table. “Why the fuck did you think this was a good idea?”

“Because this is what people do!” Merlin shouted as he fussed with dishes on heating pads to keep warm. “The holiday party is central to the whole bloody thing!”

“I’ve never thrown a real party before!”

“Yes, because there are so many in my department! The last party we had involved stringing -”

“Nope,” Eggsy said quickly. “Nope, nope, nopity, nope.” He cleaned a smudge off a plastic glass. “What if no one gets along?”

“I have a list of Christmas party games. And a great deal of beer and whisky.” Merlin stopped his fussing, and went over to Eggsy. He pointed to the ceiling. “Mistletoe.”

“You may have hung too much, you know. Lips getting a bit chaffed.”

“Do you mind?”

“No, not a fucking bit.” Eggsy went on his toes to kiss Merlin. “Okay, party is supposed to start at 7:30, which means that people will start showing up about 8, we got time to -” There was a knock on the door. “Who the fuck is on time for a party?” Eggsy hurried to the door and nodded. “Okay yeah, should have expected you’d be here on time. Happy Hanukkah bruv.”

Percival held out what was clearly a wine gift bag. “Thank you kindly, Eggsy. Happy holidays.” He stepped in and Eggsy took his coat up to their bedroom. When he came down Merlin was holding out a tray, only it weren’t a food tray.

“Merlin?” Eggsy frowned.

“Holiday cheer,” Merlin said. He was now wearing a Santa hat. On the tray were Santa hat’s, antlers, elf ears. “Here, I actually had to make this one with craft supplies.” It was a blue alice band with pictures of dreidel’s glued onto it. Merlin smiled. “This is fine right? That annoying berk god won’t strike you down?”

Percival laughed. “I think I am safe.” He put the alice band on.

“Let me get you a beer,” Eggsy said. The door rang again. “Why are people showing up?”

“Because they like you,” Percival suggested.

“Weird,” Eggsy said. 

Merlin opened the door and grinned.

“MERRY CHRISTMAS I GET TO STAY UP UNTIL 9!” Daisy shouted. She was in a dress that made her look like an elf. “I never get to stay up until 9.”

Merlin gave her elf ears. “That is impressive.” He welcomed the hug she gave. “Hello Michelle, Merry Christmas.”

She was in a red velour jumpsuit, and took the reindeer antlers. “Merry Christmas, Merlin.” She kissed his cheek. “That reindeer on your lawn is evil.”

“I know, I have killed it five times, it keeps coming back.”

“Hmm,” was all she said. “Come along little miss, let’s see about some snacks.”

“Chocolate.”

“After some form of vegetable passes your lips.”

“Not broccoli, Merlin said it is bad.”

“Yes, I know,” Michelle smiled at him, and he smiled back uncaring. “But he said carrots are brilliant didn’t he?”

“Yup.”

“The mini samosas have carrot in them, and are quite tasty,” Merlin suggested. “Made the chutney for them myself.”

“Yum,” both Michelle and Daisy said. 

It was a steady stream of people arriving, and soon their small house was packed. It wasn’t a huge party, just a dozen or so people, but they filled the main floor. Harry was off course the last to arrive, and he refused to put on any of the holiday cheer that Merlin had left. He ignored Merlin’s pout and went to where he saw Percival standing. “You don’t actually have to wear that, you know.”

“He went to effort, and I appreciate that.” Percival grinned and took it off and put it on Harry’s head. “Cute.”

Harry scowled a little but when Percival’s hand cupped his cheek, he smiled. “It can stay on for a bit.”

Daisy ran around, hopped up on sugar that her brother and Merlin sneaked her, and people sometimes sang along with the music playing on the stereo, and a good bit of food and alcohol were consumed.

“Holy shit, this is actually going well,” Eggsy stared at everyone. Harry and Percival were talking with Jamal, and his mum was chatting with the bookshop owner that Merlin had grown friendly with from buying all those books for Daisy. 

“It is. Though I sent a couple other invitations. Ibrahim, was already committed to other plans, and well, not like the other one I sent matters.” Merlin smiled sadly.

“Who’d you invite that didn’t come, I’ll beat them up,” Eggsy frowned, Merlin had worked fucking hard on this holiday cheer and no one was going to upset him.

“It is fine,” Merlin said. “I think maybe your mum and Daisy are going to be heading out.”

Michelle was trying to pry Daisy off of Harry who had been holding her the last little bit. 

“No, his wings are comfy,” Daisy whined. Everyone chuckled at the tired little girl calling Harry’s arms wings. Harry raised his brow to Merlin, who just nodded and shrugged. He guessed they’d be having a conversation about what Daisy could see another day. 

“Your bed is pretty comfy too, and you’ve actually stayed up until 9:30,” Michelle said.

“Wow,” Daisy yawned, and let herself be transferred to her mother’s arms. “Bye nice people. Bye my demons. Merry Christmas, and Happy Honkinah.” Everyone was melting over her sweetness and Percival couldn’t stop himself from running a hand down her hair.

“Goodnight, sweet one,” he said. He was so reminded of Roxy. He hoped that maybe soon he could bring her into this part of his life. She could use some of the affection this group had, versus her parents. Though she mentioned a girl that she was now seeing. Maybe that would bring her joy. “Merry Christmas, I hope that Santa fulfills your dreams.” He had never understood why parents lied to their children like that, but he would never do anything to break those dreams.

Eggsy had their coats, and they all managed to get Daisy covered and Michelle kissed his cheek. “Christmas supper, show up about 3ish?”

“We’ll be there, Mum,” he promised.

“I look forward to it,” Merlin agreed. 

No one else had a child to worry about and settled in. Merlin handed out spiked hot cider which was a huge hit, and an hour later when it was clear the party was going to be winding down soon, there was a knock at the door.

“Not going to be a noise complaint,” Eggsy said. “No way are we that loud.”

Merlin went to the door, and when he opened it, screamed. Harry and Eggsy went rushing over and screamed as well. There was that stupid plastic reindeer, with stab wounds, torn off and reattached legs, standing there, duck tape holding its head on. “What the fuck?”

The three heard a giggle. “Oh man, you should see your faces! Haven’t seen you look like that since he first floated the idea of humans to us.” The man waved his hand, and the reindeer disappeared. “That was totally my Christmas gift to myself. Can I have a Santa hat?”

Eggsy looked at Merlin. “Baby, was that other invitation you sent to the Boss?”

Merlin nodded, and stared at his brother. “Of course you can have a Santa hat,” he said slowly and stepped back.

The Boss stepped into the house. “Looks gorgeous, Merlin.”

“Thank you.”

“Boss,” Harry said faintly.

“Harry,” The Boss looked heartbroken. “I’ve missed you so much.” He took the weight easily when Harry collapsed against him and they hugged tightly. “Invention wing has had fun with stuff for that bastard, keeping him warm until Merlin comes back. Really works him.”

“Wait, the time lines don’t work, because that bastard would have been down with you Nick, when Merlin was still below.”

“Time is a funny thing back home,” The Boss said. He put on a Santa hat. “Tell me you still have some food, I love party food so much.”

“A little,” Merlin said and took The Boss to the kitchen. “You came.”

“Of course I did,” The Boss smiled. “Christmas is for family isn’t it?” He took a plate, and filled it with all the leftover bits. “So think the Jewish one can even see me?”

“I have no idea,” Merlin was a bit curious about that. They went in, and he took The Boss over to Percival. “Percival, this is Nick, someone Harry and I have known for a long time.” Merlin wasn't completely sure why he called The Boss, Nick, it just fell from his lips. Perhaps because Eggsy had called him such.

“Hello, Nick,” Percival greeted. “A pleasure.”

“Huh, not sure what to do with that,” The Boss admitted. "But it could be because of all the threads that are weaving around you, not you yourself."

“I don’t understand,” Percival looked to Harry.

“He has a habit of saying what he is thinking out loud, but only like a bit of it? Weird conversational quirk,” Harry replied smoothly.

“Yeah, sure, we’ll go with that,” the Boss agreed. “You and Harry are an interesting thing. Going to keep a closer eye. Didn’t before, was a bit busy with a few other details, but I’m watching now.”

“I am not who he knew previously.”

“No, you are a whole other kettle of fish,” The Boss agreed. “These meatballs are amazing.” He ate another one, and looked around. “Christmas is just such a trip.”

“It has been fun to experience,” Merlin said. “I like the colours of it. And when out shopping it is fun to watch all the souls that tip into clearly going to hell.”

“Three in my shop this year,” Harry added. 

Percival was looking at them all. “You have an odd relish in your voice to that.”

Eggsy hurried over. “Hey Percival, my mate Jamal has a question only you can answer.” He glared at the three of them and took Percival away.

“I’m in trouble later,” Merlin sighed. “Why are you here? Really.”

“You invited me,” the boss looked at them. “I’m glad you two are on vacation, but fuck I have missed you. Omael is fine, but not you two. Not my brothers. This time of year, angels get all loud and annoying. Even echoes into our space, the fucking singing. So thought, why not? Even got you two Christmas presents!” He pulled two small boxes from his pocket and handed them over. “No opening until Christmas.”

They both just looked at him and tore off the wrapping paper. The boss giggled a bit. Harry had a lapel pin, and Merlin a key chain. Wings, the left side how they looked before, the right how they looked now. “You are going to be wearing the human skin for a few more decades, longer than either of you ever have before. For them. Bit of protection make it easier, and to remind you. At the end of the day, who you are. Mine.”

They both looked at him. “We are our own,” Merlin growled.

Harry looked ready to reach for a weapon. “We are each others,” he said, holding onto his calm by a thread.

The boss gave them a blinding grin, the beauty just pouring out of him so that everyone in the party was staring at him. “Yeah, you are,” he said. “Good. You remember who you are.”

“We never forget,” Merlin said. “Now eat your food, and be fucking merry.”

The Boss nodded and went over to a couple of the other guests and joined in the conversation about what was the best version of a Christmas Carol.

“You had to invite him?” Harry huffed, but put the pin on his lapel.

Merlin slide the key chain into his pocket. “Christmas is for family.”

“I have missed him.”

“I as well,” Merlin agreed.

Eggsy came over to them. “Hey, so baby, next time you warn me that the devil is coming to the Christmas party, okay? Nick is confusing as fuck and I never get a chance to prepare when I see him, rather annoying.”

“You’ve met him before?” Merlin and Harry turned and stared.

“Yeah, he checks on you two regular like. We have weird conversations where he freaks me out, and is also really nice?” Eggsy frowned. “I dunno, he is sorta like you two, but not at all.”

“Aye,” Merlin agreed. “Next Christmas I will warn you he is invited.”

“Next Christmas?” Eggsy asked.

“Well, this is clearly going to be a yearly tradition, our party.” The boss was the last guest to leave, no goodbye, just a wink and he was gone. They cleaned up a bit but left what they could for the morning. They poured a last drink and sat in front of the tree.

“It was a good party,” Eggsy said.

“It was.”

“Been a pretty great Christmas,” Eggsy continued. He picked up Merlin’s hand and kissed it. “I really appreciate you going a little insane over this. Never had anyone go this nuts to make me happy.”

“Eggsy there is so much I would do to make you happy,” Merlin said. “Including the most perfect gift ever that I bought you that you will open Christmas morning.”

“Nah, mine is the most perfect.”

“Eggsy, I have poured my heart into making this traditional Christmas perfect for you. Trust me, that my gift is best.”

“Sorry, guaranteed I got you beat.”

“Bet you don’t.”

“Bet I do.”

Merlin pulled Eggsy onto his lap. “What do I get if I win?”

“A perfect Christmas kiss. The kind that shows up in your good Hallmark movies. Better than.” Eggsy said. “And if I win? You have to give me the same.”

“I think there are no actual losers in that bet,” Merlin pulled Eggsy down for a soft kiss.

“No losers on Christmas,” Eggsy said. “Come on, I want a cuddle.”

Merlin made sure all the candles were blown out, and let JB out for a last wee. He went upstairs and saw that Eggsy had laid out Christmas pajamas for him. Tacky ones. He grinned and happily put them on. He pulled Eggsy into his arms. “Sing your favourite carol for me,” he whispered and drifted off to Eggsy’s perfect voice singing about having a merry little Christmas.


End file.
